How many times do you give a person, 'one more chance'? Why do you keep forgiving them when they let you down? Why are they part of your life if all they do is cause hassle, stress, emotional turmoil?
After almost 30 years, I've finally learned that it's okay to cut off toxic people. It's not always easy but when someone is only causing you drama, it's so unhealthy and you need to distance yourself. I realised that I was distancing myself so much that I was completely eradicating them from my life because I wasn't missing their presence. Seriously though, who'd miss aggravation?
When you have a friend or family member that isn't giving you what you want from your relationship there's not much point sticking around, especially if they've had multiple chances to make something of your so-called connection. People always say that it's easier to exclude friends than family, because 'blood is thicker than water' and all that shite, but I completely beg to differ. I consider my closest friends my family, my best friend has been there for fifteen years and I have a better relationship with him than almost every member of my family. I've never let him down and he's always there for me.
I'm not saying that I dispose of a person as soon as they do me wrong, but if there's several fuck-ups or numerous times they make me feel bad, I'm just done. I've got so much more to worry about than people who don't care about me or my feelings. I always go with my gut when I'm ill-treated; if something is bothering me to a point that it plays on my mind and affects my well-being, no matter what anyone says, no matter how much reasoning they try, if I don't feel like I want to be associated with that person, I won't. I don't owe anyone anything. Relationships work two ways and if I'm the one who is continuously making an effort, always getting in touch and trying to keep the friendship alive, it gets really frustrating. You begin to think that you're not worth their time; and then when you are with them, they treat you like crap or are uninterested. What's the point in that?
I'm pretty sure most people have a sore-spot, (whether it be their appearance, sexuality, ethnicity, whatever) and if someone criticises the thing that really touches a nerve and devastates them, there's no coming back from that. A massive no-go for me is if I'm attacked because of my disability, you might as well not walk this earth because you no longer exist in my eyes. There is absolutely nothing lower, more vile, fucking disgusting, than condemning me over something I have no control over. If you think I'm faking, lying, exaggerating the amount of pain I'm in, I want absolutely nothing to do with you. This kind of toxicity is unnecessary, ignorant and downright fucked up. And it is so easy for me to never ever speak you again.
I wouldn't say I'm a sensitive person but if my disability comes into question it's a whole different ballgame. I don't take it lightly, I won't forgive, and I think I'm more than justified. If someone can say something that venomous and shatter you to the core, they're not worth being part of your life.
So I completely cut them off; I delete and block them on all forms of social media and remove them from my phone so I don't have any contact with them whatsoever. If we have mutual friends, I don't talk about the person I've cut off, and if my friend does, (even if it's just to say what they've been up to) I swerve the conversation as I'm simply not interested.
We all deserve to be surrounded by people that love us and care for us, so get rid of poisonous people - what the fuck is the point in being unhappy?